1. Who was the first Sun to buy you dinner? I’m guessing it was Sean Marks, since he’ll be facing you every day in practice.
2. What will be the best thing about playing with Steve Nash?�
����������������a. His lob passes for easy dunks?�
����������������b. His reliability as a receiver for fast break outlet passes?�
����������������c. His on-court leadership?�
����������������d. “Steve” is a lot easier to spell than “Dwyane?”
3. Who will win this year’s Super Bowl, the Patriots or the Giants? (I may be a little late with this one.)
4. Do you have any of your patented nicknames already picked out for your new teammates? If not, may I suggest the Big Fella (you), Little Big Fella (Amare Stoudemire), Big Little Fella (Steve Nash), Tough Fella (Raja Bell), Duke Fella (Grant Hill), Speedy Fella (Leandro Barbosa) and Fella From France (Boris Diaw)?
5. What was your first thought on learning you’d returned to the Pacific Division? Was it, “Oh God, now I have to go back to Sacramento more than once a year?”
6. Forget all the worries about your free throw percentage. You’re with the Suns now. How’s your three-pointer percentage?
8. Is there any truth to the rumor that you rent out your old sneakers (size 23) as guest homes? If so, do you have any Spanish Hacienda-style high-tops available?
9. Do you know if the Suns have taken out extra Basket Support Insurance with your arrival?
10. Whose shot would you rather block spectacularly into the twelfth row, sending the shooter sprawling all the way back to half-court?�
����������������a. Kobe Bryant?�
����������������b. Tim Duncan?�
����������������c. Yao Ming?�
����������������d. Pat Riley?
11. Please answer honestly: Does this shirt make me look fat?
12. As part of your announced plan to mentor Amare Stoudemire, will the two of you room together on the road? And who will get the top bunk?
13. Are you aware of Sean Marks’ many charitable works in the community, his status as a national hero in the country of his birth, and how everyone who’s ever met him says he’s just swell, you couldn’t find a nicer guy, and nothing bad should ever happen to him? (Question submitted by Sean Marks.)
Take as much time with your answers as you need, Mr. O’Neal. Feel free to respond in between dunks over Andrew Bynum.